Dating a gentleman
Even if the relationship is consensual, you have too much influence over that person’s career for the dynamic to ever be equal.An old colleague of mine says he slowly pursued a coworker he’s now married to instead of hitting on her aggressively.“My approach was to try to talk to her in a non-romantic way that could organically grow into a more obviously romantic back-and-forth,” he tells me on Facebook.“I’ve investigated a number of workplace incidents and 9 out of 10 times the man will say to me, ‘I had no idea that was harassment,’” says Roberta Matuson, who runs a business consulting company.
“The majority of times I actually believed [that he didn’t think] telling off-color jokes or asking the co-author at the conference to join him for a drink later constituted harassment.”The good news is that you can pursue an office crush without being the office creep.
Don’t pounce on every new employee and be the guy who women warn one another about.
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